Renewed Bottom 10 - Worst Christmas Movies

There are a whole lot of wonderful Christmas movies. For all ages... for all peoples... and for all backgrounds. And if you don't follow the holiday, still... that is okay too.

But there also are plenty of terrible Christmas related movies. I had a large pool to work from.

So... ready?

Bottom 10 Christmas Movies

Disonorable Mention: Christmas With The Kranks: Conformity. A couple gets shamed for not getting in the Christmas spirit. Their kids have all moved out. And this couple decides they want to go to the Caribbean... and they are basically shamed about "Lack of Christmas Spirit".

10. The Gingerdead Man: Imagine... Child's Play. But inside of the killer possessing a doll, he possesses a Gingerbread Man Cookie. Oh... and voiced by Gary Busey. It isn't as entertaining as it sounds.

9. Unaccompanied Minors: This movie had some promise. But instead of being original, it feels like it stole from all of the other movies like it.

8. The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause: The worst of the 3 Santa Clause movies. It was short. Convoluted. After a strong 2nd movie, it was disappointing to see the 3rd movie be so... bad. But... give it up for Martin Short, because he nailed it.

7. A Christmas Story 2: I wasn't the biggest fan of the first one, but this one seemed off. More so.

6. Black Christmas(2006): Remake of the original. This one doesn't have the air of mystery like the original. Notable names casted at the time, but wow did this movie not work. The original was awesome... the 2019 remake was awesome. This 2006 version is hot Holiday Garbage.

5. Home Alone 3/Home Sweet Home Alone: The Magic of the first 2 movies was a combination of Macaulay Culkin and 2 bumbling crooks the audience had no attachment to. Home Alone 3 bumped the Crook count to 4, but the kid wasn't as great. And Home Sweet screwed up by making the kid unlikable and the crooks relatable.

4. A Merry Friggin Christmas: Joel McHale and Robin Williams. For some reason, they just didn't work. The Chemistry... I didn't see any... I didn't feel any. And it's sad because it's Joel McHale and Robin Williams. And I don't blame them. Don't watch it.

3. I'll Be Home For Christmas: Jonathan Taylor Thomas... in a movie where he is tasked with getting home, all the way across the country, for the holidays. But... not for the beauty of spending time with family. No. Because of the expensive car he was supposed to get if he got there in time.

2. Santa's Slay: An interesting concept. All the gift giving Santa does, every 1,000 years, he turns into a hulking rage monster going on a killing spree. Played by BILL GOLDBERG! Sounds like a good horror film? It... wasn't. It felt like Leprechaun... with the Warwick Davis. And... that doesn't work.

And the Number 1 WORST Christmas movies...

1. Santa With Muscles: Hulk Hogan. During the nWo era. Hogan decided he wanted to make another kid friendly movie. Mongul gets amnesia, becomes a mall Santa....... and then throw in Ed Begley Jr and MAGIC CRYSTALS UNDER AN ORPHANAGE. Hulk Hogan fever dream

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These are some of the worst Christmas movies I've seen. Some of them are some of the worst movies I've seen period.

What do you think? Did I miss a stinker? Tell me what you think!

Comment... Share... CRAP ALL OVER THESE MOVIES

Merry Christmas

Happy Holidays

Hug your loved ones.

And don't forget...

Renewed Top 10 - Non-traditional Christmas Movies

Part 2 of the Christmas lists.

Time for Non-traditional Christmas movies. These are going to be movies that are either Christmas related(but don't feel like it)... or movies set during Christmas, but it is a set piece more than a plot point... or a combination of the two.

You'll get it, just like the other list.

Top 10 Non-traditional Christmas Movies

Here we go...

Honorable Mention 1: Iron Man 3: Shane Black has a hard on for setting movies during Christmas time. And this is THE MCU movie that had to do with that setting.

Honorable Mention 2: Eyes Wide Shut: Stanley Kubrick's FINAL film... about... an underground orgy. Think... Fight Club, but with sex. Holds the Hollywood record for LONGEST principal shoot, over 400 days. Set during Christmas.

10. Rocky IV: Culminating on Christmas Eve, this is ultimate boxing gift that keeps on giving. And good ol Rocky got the gift of brain damage.

9. The Long Kiss Goodnight: This is a Jason Bourne movie before Jason Bourne movies were thought of. Geena Davis discovers that she is a highly trained assassin, but with amnesia. The government wants her back. She wants to be Mom. All during the Christmas season!

8. Bad Santa: The name says it. This is not a heartwarming comedy. This is a ballbusting satire. And Billy Bob Thorton kills it as this asshole. 

7. Black Christmas(1974): This Christmas murder movie is highlighted by wonderful performances by Olivia Hussey and Margot Kidder. Sorority sisters getting picked off one by one...... watch the classic, NOT the remake.

6. Edward Scissorhands: The collaboration between Tim Burton and Johnny Depp. A gothic Christmas tale about a lonely boy and the plush society that tried to corrupt him. Yeah... that is exactly what that movie is about. Conforming in the face of individuality.

5. Lethal Weapon: THE Buddy Cop movie. Mel Gibson and Danny Glover creating their own trope. Cop soon to retire paired with new hotshot. But this one... this one is set during the Holiday season! Lead to a wonderful franchise. Written by Shane Black. Directed by the Legendary Richard Donner.

4. Gremlins: Screw Baby Yoda... this is GIZMO!!! The pet with so many weird rules, or it spawns creepy versions of itself. The sequel had a much bigger budget, but had no direction other than utter chaos. This original had a very cute mascot... and a wonderful story. Just remember... follow the rules of the gift you got.

3. Batman Returns: Tim Burton Batman sequel, introducing Danny DeVito as a creepy Penguin man and Michelle Pfeiffer as the tasty Catwoman... and... clowns? And no Vicki Vale? Anyway...... one of my favorite Batman movies. And set during Christmas. Just... for the snow lol

2. Die Hard: NYPD detective John McClane trying to save people in a tower sneaking around avoiding the gaze of Severus Snape himself, Alan Rickman. This is also a New York prequel for Harry Potter. I disgress... this movie has John trying to connect with his estranged wife and 2 children during Christmas. This... is a Christmas movie.

And the Number One Non-traditional Christmas Movie is...

1. A Nightmare Before Christmas: The Definition of Non Traditional Christmas movie, yet... it is a tradition for me to watch. Halloween meet Christmas. There is no other way to put it. It is iconic. Nothing exactly like it. And I love to sign along to Jack's Lament.

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Some non-traditional holiday presence! And I had a larger pool of movies to choose from.

Any that I missed? Have any other great movies that you think should be on the list?

Comment... share... Ho Ho Ho!!!

Stay tuned for Part 3...

Renewed Top 10 - Christmas Movies

It is time for some Christmas Movie Madness!

I need to remind the readers that I am not religious. And I say celebrate the holiday that fits you and your faith. But I still love Christmas Movies. Because... I love movies!

I have 3 Christmas Movie Lists coming your way. They are going to be "Traditional Christmas Movies", "Non-traditional Christmas Movies", and "Worst Christmas Movies".

This first one will highlight "Traditional" Christmas Movies. So what criteria am I using? These would be movies that are more associated with the Holiday than anything else...... or movies that fit the theme of Christmas celebration. Non traditional Christmas movies are going to be those that are maybe set during Christmas, but the purpose of the movie isn't Christmas related.

You'll see.

Top 10 Christmas Movies

Here we go...

Honorable Mention 1: White Christmas: The Bing Crosby classic. I admit, someone I can't stand introduced me to this movie, but I liked it. Not big on Musicals, but this... is a classic.

Honorable Mention 2: Elf: I know this is one is a favorite of many, and I do like it. But the list was too crowded for it. Will Ferrell is a legend for this movie, but it is Zooey Deschanel for the win.

10. The Santa Clause: Tim Allen as the man who killed Santa, and then took his job. It is a heartwarming movie, filled with great sight gags and Tim Allen grunts. But it is a sweet film about the definition of family.

9. Miracle on 34th Street(1994): Mara Wilson was America's sweetheart at the time, and something about her made the movies better. That is why I put this version of the original.

8. Krampus: Based on confirmed Folklore, Krampus was used to scare children into behaving. This horror film based on that is an EXCELLENT use of weird Christmas traditions.

7. Klaus: A Netflix original about a Postman who accidentally creates the legend of Santa Claus. It is a great story, and WONDERFUL animation.

6. A Charlie Brown Christmas: The Peanuts gang serving up small commentary about commercialization of the Holiday... while making it about friendship, family, and acceptance. A cute little special(and I'm counting it as a movie) 

5. How The Grinch Stole Christmas(2000): Jim Carrey as the green Christmas heathen. Over the top, flashy, colorful. And... something that would make Dr. Suess proud. And a bonus... Jim sings the Grinch theme.

4. National Lampoon's Christmas Vaction: The second best of the Vacation movies(only to the original). So memeable... so quotable. And funny as hell. Instant classic that shows how easy it is to have a mental breakdown.

3. Home Alone & Home Alone 2: Lost In New York: The movies that made Macaulay Culkin a child star. The McAllisters are more negligent than Liam Neeson in the Taken trilogy. And then we get to see a little kid take down two crooks... twice. Not the holiday season without them.

2. A Christmas Carol(various): there are 4 movies with the Christmas Carol tale that needed to make this list, and thus... they all share the number 2 slot. They are: A Muppet Christmas Carol, Michael Caine acting proper amongst Jim Henson's Muppets; A Christmas Carol(2009), with Jim Carrey playing all 3 fateful ghosts AND Scrooge, it IS a sight to see; A Christmas Carol(1999), the one with Patrick Stewart as Scrooge, because... Patrick Stewart; and Scrooged, with Bill Murray as a modern-ish day business man version of Scrooge.

And the number one Christmas Movie is...

1. Santa Claus Is Coming To Town: 10 entries, and this is the only Rankin and Bass claymation classic to make the list. Not saying I don't like some of the others, but this one is my favorite. Mickey Rooney kills it. The story is cute, memorable, and memeable. And I love the songs. This... is my favorite Christmas movie. Reminds me... I have to watch it soon.

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The holidays aren't the greatest of times for me, these movies make it bearable. And these are wonderful movies, some for the whole family(and one that isn't).

Any Christmas movies I missed that you love? Gives you that wonderful holiday spirit? Maybe something from your Childhood?

Comment... share...

SPREAD SOME CHEER!!!!

Stay tuned for Part 2...